Sitting on the Edge, Trusting in the Lord

By: Kimberly Cargill

I recently had the great opportunity to attend a ladies retreat.  It was a great time listening to a speaker, worshipping the Lord in singing, spending time in fellowship with other ladies, and enjoying nature.  One of the activities that we could do in the afternoon was zip lining.  Our group wanted to do it and it looked fun, but I am scared of heights so I was going to push myself with this challenge.

When I got to the course with the other ladies, I kept telling myself that I can do this – it’s no big deal.  We all proceeded to get harnessed up and then it was my turn to climb the stairs to get to the area.  As I started to climb, I could feel the anxiety rise in me.  I could feel it was getting harder to breathe.  So, I slowed down my pace and kept taking deep breaths.  I kept saying “My God is bigger and My God is stronger” over and over in my head.  My head knew that I would enjoy it but I was starting to doubt myself.

When I reached the top with another lady from our group, she looked at me knowing that I was scared.  She reassured me that I could do this.  I knew that I could but it was frightening.  I had actually gone zip lining a couple of times before at other locations, however those times I could just walk off the ledge and start, but this time I had to sit down on the ledge and lean forward and fall.

As I sat there on the edge, many thoughts ran through my head – “What am I doing?”, “Can I do this?”, “My God is bigger and My God is stronger” and “I am in God’s hands – He has me.”  In our previous message, we had just talked about if we really trust God with our mind and our heart.  I finally had to release my fears and let go.  So after sitting there for what seemed like forever, I did it.

At one point I asked the instructor if she could just give me a little push, but she said she couldn’t.  Afterwards, I thought about that.  It is just like our walk with God.  We may be on the verge of a major decision and we are anxious because it is outside of our comfort zone.  It would be easier if God would just give us a nudge, but God wants us to take that step of faith.  He wants us to give him our fears of falling and trust Him that He will catch us.

I am not saying it is easy and Satan uses our insecurities, but we need to remember that God is bigger and stronger than any insecurity that we may have.  We have given Him our hearts, but have we given Him our minds?  Do we really surrender all?

I am reminded of a couple of songs:

 “I Surrender All”

All to Jesus I surrender
All to Him I freely give
I will ever love and trust Him
In His presence daily live

For people like me who like to control things, that is not an easy song to sing.  Yes, I can sing the words, but to really mean it is another thing; yet, that is what God is asking us.  Do we really surrender all and give it freely?

The other is “Great Is Thy Faithfulness”

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow
Blessings all mine with 10, 000 beside

Great is Thy faithfulness
Great is Thy faithfulness
Morning by morning new mercies I see
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me

I love the assurance that this song brings while I am battling these stressful/anxious moments.  God’s love and faithfulness are GREAT. He gives us strength for what we are going through and hope for tomorrow.

 

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