A ONE-MAN GUN FIGHT

By: American Decency Staff

Just as inevitable as the unmet expectation is the certainty of the first transgression, as every husband and wife will eventually hurt their spouse by their words or actions. Either way (unmet expectation or sin) the intuitive response of the wounded spouse is resentment, which is a destructive force both in and out of the bedroom.

Using the metaphor of the marriage bed as a private vineyard, the Bible likens this resentment to “little foxes,” pests that enter the vineyard and interfere with intimacy (Song of Solomon 2:15). They often arrive unnoticed, planting themselves in the heart and mind of the offended spouse.

Small and harmless at first, they become a dangerous threat if they remain and are allowed to dwell. As anger and resentment grow, they eventually obscure even the memory of the minor first offense. This phenomenon is easily observed as couples tell their stories in coffee shops and counseling rooms— “I don’t remember what we were fighting about, but I do remember that I was absolutely furious…”

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